Under pressure
by GrandHart
Summary: Tweek and Craig are a couple. Yet it's not going well. Tweek worked so hard to be in a relationship yet now that he is in it, he is having second thoughts. Will he be able to overcome the relationship woes, or is he in for a break up?
1. Chapter 1

Craig kissed me hard. He pushed up against me. His tongue whipped against my mouth. I gasped for air in between. His hands traveled all over my body. He pushed me up against the beams of the bleacher we were behind. I knew we didnt have much time for lunch, so Craig was going to act fast. Craig hand traveled past my nipples. He rolled them between his fingers. I shudder. He bites and sucks on my neck at the same time. Before I could react Craig turned me around. I grabbed the beams. He pulled down my pants. I let out a shaky breath. Suddenly a cold wet feeling is pressed against me. I let out a moan.

"Got to find your sweet spot." Craig snaked, as he put his finger deeper in me.

My hands tighten on the beams. I try to relax. In voluntary sounds come out of me. Eventually feeling that he has done enough Craig fingers slip out. I hold onto the bar in anticipation for the next thing. I feel his dick at my back entrance. I take one big breath. Then I feel it shoved in.

I see white dots in my eyes before I let a loud cry. Craig moans out too. He gets himself deep in me. Then he sits there for a bit. I am panting. He slowly starts moving his cock in me. I try to tighten up. Craig starts picking up speed pushing in and out. I yelp moan and pant as he pushes and exits. Suddenly the speed picks up and he begins pounding hard on me. I swing my head up. Craig hand wraps around to my exposed chest. He pinches my nipples and I helplessly hold on to the beam.

"I am going to cum..." Craig whisper at me. I close my eyes.

Craig pulls out of me and I drop to my knees still holding the beam. I roll over to see Craig dick in my face. Craig is rubbing it hard. I close my eyes and try to catch my breath. One of my arms is wrapped around the beam. I can feel the snow underneath me.

"RRRRR!" Craig lets out. I open my eyes and see his cum dripping down his dick off his hand and into the snow. Craig takes a step back and tries to control his breath.

We stay still for a while breathing heavily. Eventually Craig fixes himself up and walks over to me.

"C'mon, Tweenkie" Craig says reach out his hand to me.

I take one more breath before grabbing his hand. Craig pulls me and I fall into him. My legs wobbled. Craig held me feeling my body. His mischievous hand start gliding down towards my still exposed ass. With what little strength I have I pushed away. Craig just gives me a devilish smile.

"Fine, after school then."

I ignore him as I pull up my pants. Craig walks over to me and puts his hand on my cheek. "C'mon lets go see what everyone up to."

I follow Craig out of the bleachers. We walk over to where our group hangs out at lunch. The guys where all just hanging around talking on a bench. Craig walks over to them and sits down. I walk over, but I didn't sit since my ass was hurting.

"Hey, Tweek. Want to sit here?" Kyle offered.

I shook my head. "Uh, no I am fine. I have been sitting all day ya know." I tried to cover.

"Where were you guys?" Clyde asked Craig.

"Sucking each other off." Cartman sneered.

Craig flipped Cartman off.

Before more could be said the bell rang ending lunch. Craig got up and walked to me.

"See you after school." Craig said. I nodded. He then walked off towards his next class.

I took a breath before turning and heading to my next class.

"Hey Tweek."

I turned around and saw my friend the red headed jew following me.

"Hey dude." I said to Kyle.

Kyle walked close to me. He looked at me with a serious look. "You okay, dude?"

I looked at him. Kyle had been supportive throughout my relationship with Craig. He was the only one I trusted to tell him what was happening. When, in freshman year of high school, that I fell for Craig. Kyle advised me to tell him. When I felt pressure about having sex for the first time. Kyle eased me about it. Now Kyle was helping me with my latest problem in my relationship.

I let out a sigh. "We did it again at the bleachers."

Kyle nodded. Kyle never seemed to judge me no matter what story I had.

"It's just..." I sighed. "That is all we do. I mean I am a guy and even I think we do it too much. Not to mention..." I reach up and touched the sore hickey on my neck. "It's always so rough."

"Dude, you need to tell him." Kyle said to me. I looked to the side.

"I know, but it's hard to say to Craig." I said feeling nervous.

"Dude, he is dominating you. That is not a relationship. You need to have communication." Kyle began his speech. I knew he was right but I didn't want to hear it.

"I know thanks." I cut off Kyle. I walked into class. I shared it with Kyle. We sat down at our desks.

"You can always leave." Kyle said. I turned and looked at him. I was felt shocked. I couldn't even think of how to respond. Before I could, the bell rang signaling the beginning of class.

I sat through the class thinking. Could I really leave? I worked so hard to get in the relationship. We have been together for a couple of years, and I loved him... But now after what Kyle said I couldn't help but second guess myself.

I always blindly trusted Kyle advise. So it would be difficult to just ignore his comment. I thought back about Craig. Could I leave? Should I leave? These were loaded questions and no simple answer could solve them. My stomach turn as I internally debated with myself.

My thoughts were interrupted by the bell ending the class. I stood up and waved bye to Kyle. Kyle just showed me a concerned look. I walked by, trying not to pay too much attention to him. I still needed to think about it all. I was on my way to my last class when someone jumped in front of me. I jumped slightly and when I recognized it to be Craig I flinched.

"Hey Tweenkie." Craig smiled.

"Hey, dude whats up?" I asked confused. His last class was on the other side of the building.

Craig leaned up against the wall. "I got detention."

I couldn't help but chuckle. Craig had a knack at getting detention.

"I wont be able to drive you home today."

"That's OK." I eased a bit.

Craig eyed me for a second. I tried to stare back and see what was going on in his brain. Craig pushed himself off the wall. "I will see you later, Tweeker." Craig placed his hand on my head and ruffled my messy hair. Then he walked off. I bit my lower lip. I felt conflicting thought go through my head. I walked to my last class. All class I didn't pay attention. Instead I focused on understanding how I felt.

My phone interrupted my thoughts. I discretely pulled it out and looked at it.

"After I get out of detention I will come over. Lets go out tonight. I am thinking the diner."

-Craig

I looked at the text taking it in. Craig was normally an asshole. But he did have a sweet side. The reason I fell for him was because he was straight forward, honest and there was a lot more to him then what was on the surface. But now that we have been dating for a while, the magic has become dull. And flaws not seen before were glaring now. But does that mean its time to leave? I sent a text back.

"Sure"

I closed my phone and turned my attention to the class. I couldn't focus though. My head kept going back to the glaring question of "is it over?"

The bell rang and I was quick to leave. I went to my locker and grabbed my skate board from it. I walked down the hall. I shot some waves and hi-fives to people before exiting the school. I was about to leave the court yard when my eye caught sight of something that made me stop. Wendy and Stan were making out in the corner of the court yard. I tried not to creep on them or stare for too long but I couldn't help feeling envious. The two had been dating way longer then me and Craig. They had there highs and low but for the most part they always seemed so happy. But what I was most envious about was how sweet and gentle Stan was being with Wendy.

I snapped myself out of it and tried to push onward. I dropped my board on the ground and hopped on it. I pushed myself forward and felt the wind brush across me and tousle my messy hair. My head went through thought after thought.

All relationships have problems, but how do you know if a problem warrants a break up? What if this feeling is on temporary? And if I ignore it would it go away, or am I just riding into denial? Is this too much thought for this? Wasn't love supposed to be easy?

Time seemed to go by fast as I arrived back to my house. I was so deep in thought I didn't even remember the ride over. I walked into my house and called out. There was no answer. Both my parents were at work. I felt a little relieve that Craig wasn't here. He always like to take advantage when my parents weren't home. I walked up the stairs and started a bath. Warm bath helped my sore muscles. While the bath was filling I walked downstairs to grab a cup of coffee.

People say I act more and more like my dad everyday. I wasn't a spaz like i use to be in elementary school. I got use to the coffee and became mellow from it. The only problem is that if i didn't have at least two cups of coffee per day I was completely useless. I opened the fridge and saw my cold brew had finished brewing in the fridge. I took a swig from it. I hope the coffee would bring me together and help me calm down my crazy thoughts.

I took my bath and finished my coffee, yet I still felt weighed down by everything. I walked into my messy room. Went over to my dresser and got dressed in black jeans, a grey stripped shirt and a olive green jacket. After that I flopped myself down on my bean bag. I stretched and ease myself on the bean bag chair. I thought back about relationships until my eyes started feeling heavy and I began to drift off to sleep. The last thing I thought about before I fell to sleep, was how gentle Stan seemed.


	2. Chapter 2

My lips felt the soft lips of Stans. They pressed slightly against mine. We were in sync kissing each other thoughtfully. Stan arms were wrapped around me tight and secure. One of my hands was on his cheek. It helped me guide into deeper kisses. Stan arms went to my front and he slowly undid every button on my shirt. Stan leaned in again and kissed me lightly and then a little deeper. I felt his tongue lick my lips playfully. Stan moved from kissing my lips to kissing my chin. He then moved to kissing my neck softly and then down my now reveled chest. I watched as the black hair boy move slowly down my body. He got down to the jeans. He shot me a warm glance before undoing them. Stan slowly pulled out my dick. He rubbed it softly. His finger danced along it. He lowered his head and gave the tip a kiss. Then a small lick. I leaned back my head and allowed Stan to do what he wants to me.

Suddenly I felt a burst feeling in my face. My mind didnt register what it was until my eyes slowly opened. I was in my room on my bean bag. On my face was one of my wrinkled shirts. I am guessing it was on the ground. I pulled it off. I opened my eyes more to really understand what was happening. Leaning on my bed with an annoyed look on his face was Craig.

"Craig?" I asked sitting up.

"Yeah, Craig." Craig huffed.

I rubbed my eyes. "Whats going on?"

"Where is your phone? I called you and texted you. You never anwsered." Craig shot back.

"Oh." I reached down to my pockets. "They must be in my other jeans." I mumbled. When I took my bath I must not have taken my phone out, and instead left them in the jeans that where now in the bathroom. My hand shifted on my pants until I realised there was a surprise. I had a very large hard on.

Craig looked over at me. "Did you have a nice dream?"

"What?" I said tiredly.

"After detention, I went home got dressed, and came over. You hadnt anwsered any of my text and you wouldnt anwser the door. So I used the spare key to get in. I found you asleep up here. I was going to wake you up, but you seemed to be enjoying your dream with Stan more." Craig said flatly. "You said his name in your sleep."

I stared at him surprised. The dream came back to me. I knew Craig was mad but I couldnt help but smile. Then a laugh came out of me. Craig glared at me. I smiled and tried to stifle my laughter.

"Sorry, I guess I have a thing for guys with black hair." I smiled standing up. I walked over to Craig.

Craig seemed pissed but he eased.

"You got me. I am running off with Stan." I let out another laugh. Craig let a small smile slip. We were both guys so we both knew that sometimes are eyes wonder. It's not a big deal. As long as we dont pursue it. I figured Craig was just mad about the shock. We both knew Stan was straight too. Plus Craig wasnt one to worry about such a little thing.

Craig stood up and pulled me into a hug. I tensed a bit. Craig looked at me. He grabbed my face and pulled me into a hard kiss. After we kissed a bit I pulled away. Craig stared at me for a bit before saying, "You hungry?"

"Yeah, I could eat." I said messing with my hair.

"Do you want to take care of that first?" Craig point at my pants.

I laughed. "No, it's fine. It's already going down."

Craig eyes narrowed. He turned around and began walking out of my bedroom door. "You coming?"

"Yeah, let me just grab my phone."

I ran to my bathroom and picked up my jeans that where on the floor. I pulled out of the pocket my phone. I checked and saw all of the miss messages from Craig. I scrolled through them really fast as I walked out the bathroom and down to living room where Craig was waiting.

"Ready?" Craig asked.

I was abut to put my phone away when I caught a text from Kyle. I read it over and over again.

"Tweek?" Craig asked looking at me.

"Uh... Yeah I am ready." I said putting my phone away and looking up. Craig studied me for a second before turning and walking out the door I took a heavy breath before thinking, "Should I tell Craig?"


	3. Chapter 3

Craig and I jumped into his car. I debated about telling Craig about Kyle text but ended up shoving it down on my priorities. I just wanted to try and relax and enjoy myself tonight. Craig started the car and pulled out of my drive way. I busied myself with the radio. I surfed the stations til I found a station that wasnt blasting pop at me. I eased into the passenger seat and began to space out until I felt the weight of someone watching me. I looked over and saw Craig staring at me.

"What?" I asked.

Craig turned his head back on the road. "Do you ever dream about me?"

I put my hand on my face. "Really?"

"So you only dream about Stan?" Craig said flatly.

"No I dream about you." I let out a laugh. "You are in my nightmares."

Craig shot me a glare. I just smiled back laughing. "C'mon dude, chill." I treid. Craig turned his attention back to the road. He didnt say anything else. We arrived at the diner. I hoped out of the car and lingered over into the diner. The hostess sat me and Craig at a booth. We were quick to order our food since this place is our usual. After the waitress left I eased into my booth and looked over to Craig. Craig had a serious look on his face. He didnt seem happy. He rested his head on his hand. He looked at me with dagger eyes.

"What?" I said a bit annoyed.

"Tweek, we should talk." Craig said in his perturbed voice.

I tensed up. I felt the stress of everything flooding through. Everything I tried to stow away for the night began to wash over me. A headache began and I became super focused. I looked at Craig, with my eyes wide. I waited in anticipation for whatever serious talk he wanted to have. But instead I heard another voice break in.

"Tweenkie!"

I turned my head and saw Kenny marching over towards me and Craig.

"Hey dude, what you doing?" Kenny asked leaning aganist my booth.

"Oh, um Craig and I are just grabbing a bite." I said coming back to reality.

"Cool, Hey Craig." Kenny shot a wave to Craig. Craig just nodded.

The waitress walked by and dropped off our waters, a cup of coffee for me and a milkshake for craig.

"So Tweenkie..." Kenny began by calling me by my skater name. "Did you hear the skate park just opened up?"

A smile crossed my face. "Yeah?"

"Yeah! Want to go tomorrow after school?" Kenny beamed. "It looks pretty sick."

I let out a chuckle. "I bet. Yeah, I got nothing better to do tomorrow."

"Sweet dude. Did you see that video I posted on my facebook about Sean Malto? You should watch it. He does this crazy trick where he-" Kenny was cut off by the arrival of our food. The waitress put down my cheese burger and fries infront of me. Kenny Slid into my booth next to me. He grabbed some of my fries.

"No I dont go on facebook that often." I said back grabbing the ketchup bottle.

"Hey dude are you still selling your old skateboard?" Kenny asked stealing another one of my fries.

"The Zero?" I asked back. Kenny nodded. "You can have it."

"Serious?" Kenny eye lighten.

"Yeah, dont worry about it. My parents are getting me an real nice new one."

"Sick." Kenny punched my shoulder.

"Yeah, I will bring it tomorrow." I said back taking a bite from my burger.

"Awesome." Kenny raised his hand and i gave him a Hi-five. "So, I will see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, shot me a text. "I said with my mouth full of burger.

"Seeya Tweenkie." Kenny got out of the booth. "Bye Craig."

I looked over a Craig. Craig flicked his hand up. Craig eyes were narrowed. He had the straw of his milkshake in his mouth. Kenny waved before sauntering off. I wish he would of stayed because now I was left with Craig. Craig did not look any bit happier since last I saw him.

"What?" I said taking another bite of my burger.

Craig put his shake back on the top of the table. "So do you have dreams about Kenny too?"

I sighed. "Are you still on that?" I put down my burger and reached for the ketchup. "Kenny is one of my skater bros. We are always like that when we get together. We have our own language you know." I squeezed the ketchup container on top of my burger. "Plus I can't control my dreams. They don't mean anything. I don't even remember it." I lied.

Craig studied me. He picked up one on his fires and chomped into it.

"You are right." He said picking up another fry. "I mean I recently had one with a different person in it. It's not a big deal."

"Yeah, right." I said putting the ketchup bottle down and putting my bun back on my burger. I picked up my burger and was about to bite into it when I stopped. "Who was it?"

Craig kept eating his fries. "Does it matter?"

"No, I am just curious." I said lowering my burger.

"Someone." Craig said looking bored.

"Hey, you know about mine." I argued.

Craig reached over and grabbed his shake. He began drinking it. I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Girl or boy?" I shot back at him. He looked over at me with the same bored expression. "Well?" I pushed.

Craig lowered his shake. "Girl."

"Oh..." I said. My mind began racing. Craig watched on.

"What you thinking about, Tweeker?" Craig asked tilting his head.

"Nothing..." I shot back. "Just, my dream with unattanble stan is one thing. But you dreaming about a girl..." I bit my lower lip as I thought. I glanced over at Craig. He had a pleased look on his face.

"What?" I shot back.

"Nothing." Craig put his head back on his hand. "It's just cute that your jealous."

I opened my eyes. My cheeks felt warm. I looked to the side. "Gah," I said under my breath. "You are an idiot."

After the diner, Craig asked me what I wanted to do next. I told him I was tired and wanted to just go home and finish some homework. Craig drove me back home. Craig parked the car on the street by my house. He looked over at me.

"Thanks dude for taking me out." I said with a smile.

Craig blinked at me. He leaned in and grabbed my shirt. He pulled me into a kiss. I grabbed his shoulders and felt his push on me. He took deep kisses in and stuck his tongue into my mouth. I followed, my fist tightening on Craig jacket. Craig free hand roamed freely. It made it way down to my crotch. My eyes opened and I pushed him off. Craig pushed forward as he tried to get ontop of me on the passenger car seat.

"Stop!" I barked at him. Craig stuttered. He looked as if someone had splashed cold water on him.

I panted. "Sorry, it's just I am a little tired from today at school." I looked at Craig. He looked hurt back at me. "I am sorry." I said again.

Craig shook his head. "It's ok." He mumbled. He moved back to his seat on the driver side. I looked over at him.

"Ill see you tomorrow." He said back to me. I looked at him a little stunned from the event. I nodded at him and opened the car door.

"Shoot me a text." I said to him. Craig nodded. I slammed the car door and began walking back to the house. My mind rushed. I felt awkward and uncomfortable.

I walked into my house and said hello to my parents. Then I went straight up to my room. I flopped down on my bed and put my hand on my face.

What was I going to do? I felt worse not better after tonight. Maybe I should ask Kyle.

"Kyle!" I said. I pulled out my phone and found the text from Kyle. I read it again. What should I do with this?

"Hey Tweek,

I need to talk to you. I saw Craig kissing a girl after school

-Kyle


	4. Chapter 4

My mind raced as I debated calling Kyle. What if it was a mistake? Craig had detention after school. Then my mind went to a dark thought. What if Craig hadn't gone to detention. I squeezed my phone. What if it's the girl Craig dreamed about. I didn't want to call Kyle. I didn't want to know, but I knew I had to.

I pushed the call button and listened to the rings on my phone. I tried to steady my breath.

"Hello?"

I heard Kyle voice and I wasn't sure what to say back.

"Hey, dude." I started. "Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner. I fell asleep and then I went out and..."

"It's cool." Kyle said back. "Did you get my text?"

I tightened my grip on the phone. "Y-Yeah."

"Well?" Kyle asked back.

"I don't know. Are you sure?" I felt my heart begin to race.

"I am sure of it." Kyle said back in a stern voice.

I didn't know how to respond.

"Tweek?"

"Yeah?"

"I think we both know what you should do. You aren't happy. Don't torture yourself."

"Yeah." I said back.

"You okay?"

I shook my head no. But instead I said. "Yeah fine. I got to go."

I hung up on Kyle before he could say anything else. I didn't even want to make that call.

I let my phone drop on my bed and I looked up at the ceiling. How did I even get in this situation?

I closed my eyes and remembered when I first fell for the black hair asshole name Craig.

It was the start of Freshmen year. I was really nervous. This was high school. This was huge. I remember messing with my hair and putting on different shirts all morning. Eventually I settled on my standard. The typical skateboarder fashion. Vans, jeans and band tee.

I left that morning shaking slightly out of nerves. I walked outside my house and put down my new Zero brand skate board. I got on it and pushed myself forward. I tried to steady my myself on it and not twitch as much. I was still getting a hang of skate boarding at that time.

I got to school and saw my friends all hanging at the court yard. I tried to look cool by boarding over to them in style. I tried to disembark with some style but instead I fell off and stumbled forward. My friend oohed and laughed at me. I looked up embarrassed, trying to play it off.

I looked at Clyde, Token and Craig. We had been a group since the beginning. I was happy that we were able to stay friends this whole time even though Clyde was really into drama now, Token was into choir and I was really into skate boarding. Craig on the other hand wasn't into much. He usually just kept to himself but still somehow always got into trouble.

"Hey dudes." I said joining up with them.

"Hey, ready for our first year?" Clyde asked with a smile.

I let out a nervous breath. Everyone laughed. We began talking back and forth and shooting the breeze. I felt eased until I felt an arm rest on me. It would have been fine if the arm wasn't connected to Craig Tucker. I tensed up and felt my heart race. I began saying random stupid things. My friends looked at me confused. All I could do was smile in embarrassment. I didn't even know why I felt so nervous.

"Hey Tweenkie!"

I turned and saw my savior from making a fool of myself in an orange Jacket. Kenny was walking over to me.

"Tweenkie?" Craig asked.

I let out a nervous laugh. "It's my skater name, I guess."

"What's Kenny name?" Token asked.

"Just Kenny, except he has a move called "dead man walking"." I said. The group chuckled.

"Hey Tweek." Kenny reached out his hand. I slapped it then pound it.

Following Kenny was Eric Cartman.

"Hey Tweek is the ramp still up in your backyard?" Kenny beamed. "Fatass wants to give it a try."

"Tch, if it can handle me. I one time jumped over like 20 homeless guys on my skateboard." Eric smiled.

"You did not!"

We all turned and saw Kyle and Stan walking towards us.

"Don't listen to the jew." Eric said back.

"Shut up, fatass." Kyle said joining our group.

"You have a ramp?" Craig asked me.

My eyes widen when he asked me. My heart fluttered and I couldn't bring myself to make a noise.

"Yeah, Tweenkie and I made it together over the summer. It sucks that south park doesn't have a skate park." Kenny Voiced in.

"It's not a big deal. Just a simple ramp." I said feeling self-conscious.

"Alright I'll come over and show you what I got." Eric interjected.

"Wait I want to see the fatass fail." Token chimed in.

"Me too." Clyde said.

"Yeah ill come too." Stand said with a stretch.

"I guess it's a party then." Kenny smiled.

Everyone began talking, except for me. I was standing way too close for my comfort to Craig. I looked over at him and he looked bored out at the rest of the crowd.

"S-So are you going to be there?" I asked feeling nervous.

Craig looked at me. I felt hot again. Then Craig surprised me, he smiled at me. I still can remember that warm smile. My face felt hot and I could tell I was getting red. I was saved by the bell. Everyone like cockroaches scattered to their first classes.

I got to my first class and didn't recognize anyone. I looked forward and suddenly felt relieved when I saw Kyle in a desk towards the front. I bee lined over to him and plopped down.

"Hey." I said to him as I got situated in my seat.

"Hey." He shot back.

The class started and the teacher did their first day of school speech which lead into a get to know you exercise. Kyle and I teamed up. I looked down the work sheet and saw all the weird questions we were supposed to ask each other. I sighed.

"This is pretty gay." I snickered at Kyle. "Let's just say we did this."

"Okay." Kyle said back. "But we should still ask some questions."

"Like what?" I snorted back.

"Like, do you have a crush on Craig."

My eyes widen. I quickly look around the room hoping no one had heard. I then shot my attention back at Kyle.

"What are you saying?" I snapped.

I looked down at the red headed jew, ready for a fight. But more importantly hoping he didn't see something I hadn't.


	5. Chapter 5

"You aren't hiding it well." Kyle said back.

"What you mean. I am not a fag." I said, trying to sound cool.

"I'm not saying you are anything. But your face was getting pretty red." Kyle said in a calm voice.

"Tch, that was nothing." I said back as I felt my face become hot again.

"Alright, but you know you can talk to me if you need to." Kyle said.

"Whatever." I said back. I began doodling on the paper in front of me to try and take my mind off of Kyle comment. Yet it kept haunting me. I slammed down my pencil and looked up at him. He wore face that wasn't judging or in any way showed a bad intention.

"Why do you care?" I asked back. Even though Kyle seemed harmless, I couldn't get the idea that he was making fun of me out of my head.

Kyle gave me a soft smile. "Because I can relate."

My eyes widen at this information. I felt my heart race. I looked back down and mumbled. "Whatever Kyle…" To him.

The bell rang and I couldn't get out of there fast enough. The rest of the day I was constantly reminded of what Kyle had said. I didn't pay attention during class. I was too busy trying to figure out why I had been acting so weird. I was just nervous. It was the beginning f High school, so yeah, I just want to look cool. And Craig was my best friend so of course I would want him to think I am cool. It's fine.

Yet at lunch, it wasn't fine. I had clammed up. I couldn't speak in front of Craig. Everyone at the table was chatting up a storm and yet I was too busy having my body concave into itself. I wanted to disappear. This was all Kyle fault. I told myself. I feel even more nervous because of what he said. Still I couldn't help sneaking glimpse at Craig now and then. It was a weird feeling. A mixture of elated happiness and anxiety and a bit of fear. Either way I wasn't sure how to deal with it. How was I going to deal with it after school, when everyone was at my house?

There was only one thing to do. I stood up awkwardly and walked as quickly as I could over to Kyle.

"H-Hey Kyle." I grabbed his sleeve. "Can we talk?"

"OOOOH!" Cartman hollered. He was trying to imply or start something, but I didn't have the time for it.

"Shut up, Cartman." Kyle said. Then the two of us walked to a secluded area.

"What's up dude?" Kyle asked.

I slid down the wall. "So maybe, there could be a slight truth to what you said today…. It's not weird or anything… I mean maybe it's just a crush… Or maybe it's just a mistake…"

Kyle had a smile on his face. He looked like he wanted to laugh. I became embarrassed.

"This is your fault!" I accused.

Kyle sat down next to me and put a hand on my shoulder.

I sighed. "What do I do?"

"Tell him." Kyle said quickly.

"No way dude!" I said angrily. "How do I get rid of it?"

Kyle smiled again. "Tell him."

"You aren't listening!" I badgered.

Kyle stretched. "Just tell him. It's the only way to control your feelings. If you don't then they will go haywire." Kyle looked at me with sincere eyes. "You need to be honest. It's the only way you will feel better about it."

I looked back with pleading eyes. That wasn't the answer I wanted. I wanted to be cured or fixed. Now I will have to confront it. Maybe Kyle was wrong. I thought to myself. Maybe I could just ignore it all together.

"By the way." Kyle broke into my thoughts. "You have been pitching a tent for most of lunch now."

My eyes widen and I looked down. My face went beet red and I let out a gasp before looking back up.

"Alright, I'll tell him." I said in a defeated voice.

#

The rest of the school I was busy practicing what I was going to say to Craig. I wanted it to be cool. Not a big deal like; Hey dude did you see that last movie? And by the way I pitched tents when you are around. Nope, I mean more like; What's up dude? Did you see any good looking girls at school today? I mean I was more distracted looking at you- Ahhhhh no. Maybe like; Hey dude, I get really excited when you are around- Oh god. This was not going to go well.

I felt so defeated. It didn't need to be a big deal. After all, this was just a phase or a crush. I was sure it would pass. I started feeling a bit better by that. This was just a crush. So I didn't need to admit it to Craig. I just needed to admit it to myself. Well, I have a crush. Done. I let out a sigh and got ready for after school.

#

After school, all my friends and I rode the bus to my house. When we got there, everyone began hanging and acting obnoxious. I stayed in the background. I am good one-on-one. But get too many people in the room and I would prefer to be in the back.

Kenny and Cartman where showing off on the small ramp. Token and Clyde where making jokes. Stan and Kyle where trying to make Cartman mess up. And I was just watching on.

"Aren't you going to skate?"

I turned to my side. Craig was right next to me. I wondered how long he was there for. He looked over at me. My face began to feel hot again. Then he showed me his rare smile again I opened my mouth and I couldn't help it.

"I love you…." My eyes widen with realization. "FUCK!"


	6. Chapter 6

I opened my eyes. I wasn't the freshmen kid anymore. I was in the present. I didn't want to remember anymore. Not today. I was already getting pulverized by my emotions. I loved Craig. He was a part of me. But now I needed to let him go. The magic of the relationship was fading and more importantly he cheated on me. There was no justifying it. I needed to end it.

Yet for some reason, I wasn't mad. I felt sick and numb. It didn't help that all I could think about at that moment was Craig smile.

My phone vibrated in my hand. I looked at it and grimaced.

"We need to talk."

-Craig

I took a breath. I hated talks, but I hated waiting to deal with a shit situation more. I clicked the call button.

"Hey?" I heard the raspy voice pick up.

"Hey." I said back trying to muster confidents.

"I thought we talk tom-"

"We need to break up." I started.

"What?" I heard back in an angered tone.

I debate my next line. Should I call him a cheater or should I just try and end it quickly? "It's just not working out." I chickened out and said.

"I see." Craig said in a flat voice.

There was silence after it. It made me nervous I just wanted to get off the phone.

"If that's what you want…" Craig finally said. "Tell Kyle I said hi."

Then Craig hung up. I scratched the back of my head in confusion. What did he mean by that? Craig response to it all was very strange. I couldn't dwell on it for too long because now I needed to deal with the new fact. Craig and I were done. I no longer had a boyfriend.

I felt my knees go weak. I crawled up to my bed and buried myself in it.

"Tomorrow will be better." I told myself before I fell to sleep.

#

The next day, I woke up in a stupor. I walked around my room in a numb state picking and grabbing clothes from the ground. I eventually got dress and was in the bathroom finishing getting ready. I stared at myself in the mirror. Life seemed to have a grey filter on it. I still felt numb and sick from last night. I examined myself. I had bags under my eyes. I looked pale. I smirked to myself because my shirt wasn't buttoned right. I finished my analysis of myself before heading down the stairs.

I picked up my skate board and pulled out my old one. I threw my old board into my back pack. Kenny and I was going to the skate park after school. Today would be ok, I reassured myself. I went into the kitchen and poured myself a cup of coffee. I took a few minuets to steady myself. I thought I be ok. I thought I just be numb today. But while I stood in the kitchen sipping my coffee, trying to tell myself I was going to be ok today, the sadness found me. I felt it creep up my spine and twinge in my eyes. I fought it off. But deep down I felt the low blow. I wasn't going to be ok. This wasn't going to be a good day. But there was nothing I could do but stand up and walk out to this shit of a day.

I made my way to the front yard. I opened the door and looked down at the snow covered sidewalk. I took a deep breath and lifted my head.

"Hey."

My eyes widen as I zeroed in at the figure on my drive way. The figure walked towards me. I shuttered slightly.

"I said we needed to talk." The raspy voice said to me.

I shivered. I should have said something. I should have done anything. But instead I acted on instinct. My heart fluttered and instead I ran. I was a coward. I was emotionally strained. And the last thing I wanted to deal with was him. I knew that there was a lot left unresolved. Maybe I also wanted some closure. But I couldn't face him. I was a coward. We had been in a relationship for years, and now I treated him like he is nothing to me.

I hated myself in that moment. But I couldn't have faced him. I didn't want him to see the tears.


	7. Chapter 7

I put my skate board down on the side walk and pushed forward. I pushed hard trying to distance myself. But I couldn't go faster then a car. Craig car creeped next to me.

"Hey dumbass, get in the car." I heard Craig call out of his car as he slowed next to me.

I knew I couldn't run. I shouldn't either. So I had to just end it now. "Why? We arent together anymore."

"You willing to give up on us that easy?" Craig called out. My heart stung by his words. "Well I'm not. Get in the car so we can talk."

It wasn't going to end. Craig was going to draw it out and he was making me feel guilty. I stopped and kicked up my board. I opened the passenger door and slid in. Craig eyed me but I chose to stare forward. I couldn't look at him, I was filled with too much emotion. I needed to stay level headed right now. Craig drove forward. We didn't say anything. I waited anxiously for what was going to happen. But he didn't say anything. We turned into the school parking lot. We sat in silence for a second as Craig turned his car off.

Craig took a deep breath in, then he turned and looked at me.

"Tweek, I won't let us break up."

My skin crawled. It was kind of sweet, but mostly it just reminded me of how controlling he was.

"I was mad last night." Craig continued. "I needed to think about it, and… I wont do it. I cant lose you, Tweek."

I felt my breath get caught in my throat. I knew Craig was being sincere, but it still stayed. Our relationship was screwed. Craig was rough possessive and the jealous type. I didn't doubt Craig loved me, I knew he did. Maybe we could work through our problems, after all it wasn't all bad. There were a lot of good memories too. But there was one thing I would never be able to forgive him. As much as Craig loved me and as much as I loved him, there would be no way I could forgive him cheating on me.

"Craig…" I began. I felt so nervous, I didn't know how I was going to play it off. "I want to break up."

"NO!" Craig said back. I felt my gut turn.

"I can't be in this relationship. Please stop." I felt as if I was going to cry. I leaned forward in my seat and put my face in my hands. I felt like shit and he wasn't making it any easier.

"Is it someone else?" Craig voice was softer.

"No." I said trying to calm myself. Some time passed, Craig didn't say anything and I didn't know what to say.

"I am sorry." Craig said.

I looked up Craig head was turned he was looking out the window.

"I am sorry, Tweek." Craig mumbled out. "We can break up."

My eyes widen. I had no idea what happened, what changed. I nodded and opened the car door.

"I am sorry too, Craig." I said back before pushing myself out of the car. Craig didn't look at me. I couldn't understand what was going through his head. But in the end, I didn't know what was going through mine either. When I closed the car door, I felt cold. It was over.


End file.
